Professional Parting Of Ways Or Break-Up?

The day after sticking to my decision and the day after the day after announcing it, a very strange feeling came over me, and one I absolutely did not see coming (at least not in the context of leaving my job). It wasn't regret or guilt or relief. It was sadness, and it was intense. Being so unexpected, I had no way of coping with it and had to let it take over for awhile. It was the last thing I expected to feel, and it brought with it a compassion for the people I'm leaving behind at my job. All these years I knew I was valuable, but I would not have guessed that my value transferred so extensively to a personal level. It took me by surprise, and my shock manifested as a deep, deep sadness over the mutual (if temporary) emptiness my boss and I will both feel. To be cared for, even if it's not always healthy or mutually beneficial, is a powerful and special thing.

The important things are to know when to move on and to be able to separate emotions from actions. Part of my sadness, if I am to analyze myself, comes from having made a decision I believed to be a practical and unemotional one that turned out to have an unexpected consequence: a genuine emotional reaction from my boss, which in turned sparked my own. I was prepared for a fight, but I wasn't prepared for a hug.

In any case, I have to deal with, learn from, and be thankful for these strange feelings as they pop up. I have to realize that a certain amount of discomfort is going to come with a new beginning. I have to give myself a chance, or I'll never know either how good I've had it or how much I've been missing.

I've Gone And Done It

Today I finalized the first step of my still-forming plan: I gave my notice at work. My emotions are mixed and I'm still processing; I've definitely considered the ramifications but in reality I have no idea what's coming. There's a sense of relief, but there's also a nagging uncertainty. The goal is, instead of letting it become my enemy, to exploit that uncertainty. To that end I am considering this a challenge, a self-administered test I have no choice but to pass. And that's about all I can say right now.

Today's Childhood Rediscovery

I recently remembered a favorite treat from my childhood, Iced Circus Animal cookies, which are animal crackers dipped in pink or white icing and covered with tiny rainbow-colored candy sprinkle balls. After listening to me go on and on about them (but not having ever heard of or tasted them herself), a friend of mine saw them on display at the supermarket and picked up a bag for me. And I've been stuffing my face with them nonstop since. Isn't it amazing to rediscover something you loved as a kid and find that it's still as wonderful as you remember it? Now THIS is a happy moment.

The Very Mysterious Mystery of the Milk Cartons in NYC

I've wondered since becoming independent in New York City (and by extension purchasing milk on a regular basis) why there are two sell-by dates on milk cartons sold in the area. There is the standard sell-by date and then there is the NYC sell-by date, which is typically two to three days earlier than the standard sell-by date. Well, mystery solved. Not surprisingly, it has to do with city regulations on how long a grocer can sell milk after 6:00 a.m. on the day of pasteurization. Thank you, Gothamist, for enlightening me. I'm glad to see there are others curious about this (one of very, very many) New York City quirk.

Selling Myself

I'm not very comfortable with it (or good at it), and yet I've got to figure out a way to be. My indecision with regard to my future has messed me up to the point that I don't feel I have anything all that great even to say about myself. Now as I begin writing cover letters (again) I'm finding it difficult to muster the enthusiasm I once felt for my transferable skills.

I've written some pretty good cover letters in my time, or so I thought. They didn't get me hired. (In fact, what got me hired at my current position was my GPA and alma mater.) In a cover letter I focus not only on my skills but also on my passions -- how I make a connection with my product, how I pride myself on the quality of my work. I relate the relevance of a personal or professional experience to the job I'm applying for. I tailor each resume submission accordingly. I put a lot of myself into a job application, which means I spend a lot of time on it and I take it personally when I'm not considered. I don't see how the personal touches could be so easily overlooked, but in reality, isn't the person looking at these documents merely glancing, scanning, absorbing words here and there, but not the full picture? Am I putting too much of myself into (i.e. working too hard on) these job applications?

Most jobs these days are posted online and offer as a point of contact only an email address (and usually a generic one so you can't get a person's name, e.g. resumes@abc123.com), with an all-caps warning: "NO PHONE CALLS." In this day and age, you'd think a passionate cover letter would be just the ticket to impress a prospective employer given that you can't get any face or voice time like you could in the old days. You'd think in the flood of mundane applications that one demonstrating the respondent's actual personality would stand out at least a little. Well I thought about these things last night as I re-evaluated a cover letter I'd written earlier this summer and that I intend to revise this week to apply for a different position at the same company. Studying my words, I saw the requisite boring stuff about my skills and achievements, but I also saw the anecdotes about my education and experiences that tied me to the company's mission, and how these anecdotes offered up my human side to the prospective employer. I saw all this and I got frustrated. In conclusion, let me borrow from Carrie Bradshaw. As I reflected on the many hours I spent on cover letter brainstorming sessions that proved in the end to be no more than an exercise in missing valuable sleep on a weeknight, I couldn't help but wonder: Have we been OVER-selling ourselves? Or are there really so many more qualified candidates than me? Maybe it's time to streamline. If nothing else at least it would allow for more job applications completed.

I Have Nothing To Say, So I'll Post Some Favorite Travel Photos

With any luck, to be continued. And continued, and continued. . .

Papohaku Beach on Mokokai, HI

Foothills on Kauai, HI

California Wine Country

Smoky Mountains Cabin


Cades Cove (Smoky Mountains) Stream

British Museum Interior

Beijing - Forbidden City


China's Great Wall


Saugerties, NY Lighthouse

The F.A.M.S.B.T.T. Results

Well, the results are in. I don't want to say that the F.A.M.S.B.T.T. was a bust, but I also can't say that I'm going to be looking for a job as a sommelier any time soon.

Below, a recap of the contenders, the judges' comments, and the final decision.

The Contenders:

Contender #1 (The Favorite): Kim Crawford 2007 Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc, $11.99

Contender #2 (The Challenger): Cooper's Creek 2007 Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc, $8.99

Contender #3 (The Longshot): King Shag 2007 Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc, $7.99

The Judges' Comments:

Judge #1 described the Kim Crawford as "better" than the King Shag. The King Shag he deemed "verdant," and the Cooper's Creek impressed him with its "spiciness."

Judge #2 disagreed with his characterization of the Cooper's Creek as spicy; she found it fruity and on the sweet side. The Kim Crawford smelled and tasted "fuller" to her than the others. King Shag, she felt, tasted the "cheapest" and offered a "very green" finish.

Judge #3 (yours truly) also got a green feel from the King Shag, in which she tasted grass. She found the Cooper's Creek to be the lightest of the wines with a hint of green pepper, while the Kim Crawford had a fuller flavor and a syrupy mouthfeel with tropical fruit hints.

The Final Decision:

Pour 'em all!

All three were delicious (a cop out, I know). Who can decide? I leaned toward the old standby Kim Crawford, but it might be worth it to do a blind tasting next time to see how/if that changes things. Kim Crawford is a great buy at under $15 and it has a good reputation. In fact, during our tasting another friend stopped by and when we offered her a glass of it she said, "Ooooh, I love Kim Crawford Sauvignon Blanc!" So there you have it.